HOW TO WIN FRIENDS ETC. BY DALE CARNEGIE

What is this magic requirement?

 Just this: a deep, driving desire to learn,

 a vigorous determination to increase 

your ability to deal with people.

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Say to yourself over and over:

 ‘My popularity, my happiness and sense of worth

 depend to no small extent upon my skill in dealing with people.’

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 But if you are reading because you want to increase your skill in human relations, 

then go back and reread each chapter thoroughly.

 In the long run, this will mean saving time and getting results.

Ask yourself just how and when you can apply each suggestion.

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. Bernard Shaw once remarked: ‘If you teach a man anything, he will never learn.’ 

Shaw was right.

 Learning is an active process. 

We learn by doing. 

So, if you desire to master the principles you are studying in this book, do something about them. 

Apply these rules at every opportunity.

If you don’t you will forget them quickly.

 Only knowledge that is used sticks in your mind.

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In order to get the most out of this book: 

a. Develop a deep, driving desire to master the principles of human relations. 

b. Read each chapter twice before going on to the next one. 

c. As you read, stop frequently to ask yourself how you can apply each suggestion. 

d. Underscore each important idea. 

e. Review this book each month.

 f. Apply these principles at every opportunity.

 Use this volume as a working handbook to help you solve your daily problems.

g. Make a lively game out of your learning by offering some friend a dime or a dollar every time he or she catches you violating one of these principles.

h. Check up each week on the progress you are making.

 Ask what mistakes you have made, what improvement, what lessons you have learned for the future.

 i. Keep notes in the back of this book showing how and when you have applied these principles.

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Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually makes him strive to justify himself. 

Criticism is dangerous, because it wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and arouses resentment.

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George B. Johnston of Enid, Oklahoma, is the safety coordinator for an engineering company. 

One of his responsibilities is to see that employees wear their hard hats whenever they are on the job in the field. 

He reported that whenever he came across workers who were not wearing hard hats, he would tell them with a lot of authority of the regulation and that they must comply. 

As a result he would get sullen acceptance, and often after he left, the workers would remove the hats. 

He decided to try a different approach. 

The next time he found some of the workers not wearing their hard hat, he asked if the hats were uncomfortable or did not fit properly. 

Then he reminded the men in a pleasant tone of voice that the hat was designed to protect them from injury and suggested that it always be worn on the job. 

The result was increased compliance with the regulation with no resentment or emotional upset.

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Do you know someone you would like to change and regulate and improve? 

Good! That is fine. 

I am all in favour of it.

 But why not begin on yourself?

 From a purely selfish standpoint, that is a lot more profitable than trying to improve others – yes, and a lot less dangerous. 

‘Don’t complain about the snow on your neighbour’s roof,’ said Confucious, ‘when your own doorstep is unclean