EXCERPTS AND GEMS FROM THIS BOOK.
EASILY AVAILABLE WITH AMAZON.IN
BUY ,READ,ENJOY AND PRACTISE.
YOU WILL BE DOING YOU A GREAT FAVOUR.
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What is this magic requirement?
Just this: a deep, driving desire
to learn,
a vigorous determination to increase
your ability to deal with
people.
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Say to yourself over and over:
‘My popularity, my
happiness and sense of worth
depend to no small extent upon my skill
in dealing with people.’
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But if you are reading
because you want to increase your skill in human relations,
then go
back and reread each chapter thoroughly.
In the long run, this will
mean saving time and getting results.
Ask yourself just how and when you can apply each suggestion.
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. Bernard Shaw once remarked: ‘If you teach a man anything, he will
never learn.’
Shaw was right.
Learning is an active process.
We learn
by doing.
So, if you desire to master the principles you are studying in
this book, do something about them.
Apply these rules at every
opportunity.
If you don’t you will forget them quickly.
Only
knowledge that is used sticks in your mind.
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In order to get the most out of this book:
a. Develop a deep, driving desire to master the principles of human
relations.
b. Read each chapter twice before going on to the next one.
c. As you read, stop frequently to ask yourself how you can apply each
suggestion.
d. Underscore each important idea.
e. Review this book each month.
f. Apply these principles at every opportunity.
Use this volume as a
working handbook to help you solve your daily problems.
g. Make a lively game out of your learning by offering some friend a
dime or a dollar every time he or she catches you violating one of
these principles.
h. Check up each week on the progress you are making.
Ask what mistakes you have made, what improvement, what lessons you
have learned for the future.
i. Keep notes in the back of this book showing how and when you have
applied these principles.
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Criticism is futile because it puts a person on the defensive and usually
makes him strive to justify himself.
Criticism is dangerous, because it
wounds a person’s precious pride, hurts his sense of importance, and
arouses resentment.
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George B. Johnston of Enid, Oklahoma, is the safety coordinator for an
engineering company.
One of his responsibilities is to see that employees
wear their hard hats whenever they are on the job in the field.
He reported
that whenever he came across workers who were not wearing hard hats, he
would tell them with a lot of authority of the regulation and that they must
comply.
As a result he would get sullen acceptance, and often after he left,
the workers would remove the hats.
He decided to try a different approach.
The next time he found some of
the workers not wearing their hard hat, he asked if the hats were
uncomfortable or did not fit properly.
Then he reminded the men in a
pleasant tone of voice that the hat was designed to protect them from injury
and suggested that it always be worn on the job.
The result was increased
compliance with the regulation with no resentment or emotional upset.
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Do you know someone you would like to change and regulate and
improve?
Good! That is fine.
I am all in favour of it.
But why not begin on
yourself?
From a purely selfish standpoint, that is a lot more profitable than
trying to improve others – yes, and a lot less dangerous.
‘Don’t complain
about the snow on your neighbour’s roof,’ said Confucious, ‘when your
own doorstep is unclean.
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When dealing with people, let us remember we are not dealing with
creatures of logic.
We are dealing with creatures of emotion, creatures
bristling with prejudices and motivated by pride and vanity.
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Benjamin Franklin, tactless in his youth, became so diplomatic, so
adroit at handling people, that he was made American Ambassador to
France.
The secret of his success? ‘I will speak ill of no man,’ he said, ‘. . .
and speak all the good I know of everybody.
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Any fool can criticise, condemn and complain – and most fools do.
But it takes character and self-control to be understanding and
forgiving.
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Instead of condemning people, let’s try to understand them.
Let’s try to
figure out why they do what they do.
That’s a lot more profitable and
intriguing than criticism; and it breeds sympathy, tolerance and kindness.
‘To know all is to forgive all.’
As Dr. Johnson said: ‘God himself, sir, does not propose to judge man
until the end of his days.’
Why should you and I?
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Don’t criticise, condemn or complain.
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